Healthy social influence occurs between most people, and is part of the give and take of constructive relationships.
In psychological manipulation, one person is used for the benefit of another.
The same supervisor is also easily manipulated by the same male boss (the boss of the entire organization) I referred to above and I find this to be disturbing that some ppl allow themselves to be so easily manipulated, esp women. It's difficult for people to tell the difference between genuine positive social interaction and flattery for nefarious reasons.
This can range from low balling in a negotiation situation, to a sudden profession that she or he will not be able to come through and deliver in some way.
Typically, the unexpected negative information comes without warning, so you have little time to prepare and counter their move.
and that is the reason that he's now started dropping hints of promotion/new positions, etc..
I have seen him use flattery before, especially on women and they blush in reaction because they eat it up!!!
It is working, she is the worst employee in our dept, possibly the entire organization, yet she has our supervisor wrapped around her finger and covering for all of her screw ups!
It's maddening to the rest of us in the dept, as we can see it clear as day.
Granted, I am a very good employee, but it seems as if he goes overboard with flattery and he's taken it one step further and is now promising possible opportunities/promotion in upcoming years.
I cannot help but think that it's just an empty promise, I am already a high performer, so isn't an effective way to motivate me, however I have this nagging feeling he doesn't want me to leave to work elsewhere...
Psychological manipulation can be defined as the exercise of undue influence through mental distortion and emotional exploitation, with the intention to seize power, control, benefits and/or privileges at the victim’s expense.
It is important to distinguish healthy social influence from psychological manipulation.
By pretending she or he doesn’t understand what you want, or what you want her to do, the manipulator/passive-aggressive makes you take on what is her responsibility, and gets you to break a sweat. Holding another responsible for the manipulator’s happiness and success, or unhappiness and failures. I have unwittingly manipulated people in the past and it is something I still sense a need in myself to change now I have seen it in myself for what it is. I know it is never easy to admit to and face head on I'm seeing this in a work environment.