" Let me give you the run down on the obstacles we men have to climb to get to that point. We hesitate to ask because getting shot down 100 times is not my vision of the romantic pathway to finding “the one.” It gets old after a while. Real relationships are give and take, and if I am all give and no take, I won’t pursue that relationship.
So make a bit more of an effort to date and open up a time for us. Obstacle #2: The Hint We are not as stupid as we may seem, or look, or act, or … When you say, “I would love to, but …” I throw up a red flag.
As anyone currently braving the world of dating knows, finding true love is no easy feat.
Chancellor College sociologist Charles Chilimampunga, says it is harmless in having friends of the opposite sex while in a relationship despite there being challenges that can come as a result of such friendships.
He says it is socially acceptable for a male or female to have friends of the opposite sex outside relationships, but emphasises that things have to remain on the friendship level and not more than that.
It isn’t difficult to imagine that for some, the promise of a bit more social currency and safety could be compelling reasons to seek out an opposite-sex partner, even unconsciously.
Americans have a well-documented tendency to drastically overestimate the percentage of queer folks among us.
We clearly do not see how this can, or does negatively affect our love life.
Linda Mgwadira, a student at National College of Information and Communication Technology (Nacit) in Blantyre says it is okay to have friends of the opposite sex when one is in a relationship as there is no harm in doing so.“It is not toxic, but one should just be able to separate between friendship and relationships.The two things need to be clearly defined,” he says.Dan Savage once observed that “most adult bisexuals, for whatever reason, wind up in opposite-sex relationships.” Whether or not you’re a fan of Savage (or his sometimes dubious takes on bisexuality), the statistics support his assertion: The massive 2013 Pew Research LGBT Survey found 84 percent of self-identified bisexuals in committed relationships have a partner of the opposite sex, while only 9 percent are in same-sex relationships. Because on the surface, the fact that 84 percent of bisexuals eventually wind up in opposite-sex partnerships could appear to support the notion that bisexuality is, as people so often insist, actually either “just a phase” or a stepping-stone on the path to “full-blown gayness.” Knowing that wasn’t true, I decided to investigate.Some of my initial suppositions included internalized homophobia, fear of community and family rejection, and concerns over physical safety.At our best, bisexuals are queer ambassadors: We’re out here injecting queer sensibilities into the straight world, one conversation and one relationship at a time.