He has dealt with several parents' questions recently along the same lines (how do I support my kid while she/he goes through this growing-up-and-exploring-love mess), and his advice falls along the lines of "love your child, support your child, stick up for your child, and let them know you have their back." You're doing all these things.
The way these events unfolded is an unfortunate one, and I feel rather sorry for your current predicament as a family.
By forbidding your daughter from seeing her 17-year-old friend, it seems to me that you possibly accomplished several things: Well, it is of course quite possible that I've missed the mark in some of my analysis.
Someone who can help her find her way through this morass?
We've all been there but it's SOOOO hard for a teen to see that, especially when it's a parent saying it.
I told her I was her mama and that I just knew and that I would love her unconditionally.
She said she still liked both guys and girls, but she definitely liked the 17 year old and she couldn't help her feelings. Fast forward two weeks- we've told dad which was hard but he is supportive (ish) it's still new.
) She told me that her and the 17yo were "seeing each other" and that the 17yo has an "open" relationship with a boy as well, which means they can see other people.
Well, I met with the 17yo, (who insisted they were friends) explained they were not allowed to see each other anymore, and thank goodness the 17yo obliged.
I'd also recommend trying to spend some 'normal' time with her, if you can.